My Attempt at Comedy



How many of you have heard of Jeff Foxworthy? Or better question is, how many of you have heard Jeff Foxworthy's stand up comedy routine called You Might Be a Redneck? Well for some reason my mind went to comedy recently when I was thinking about a friend whose husband must be a narcissist. I was processing all the new information I was receiving about her relationship plus all of the red flags that I had seen in her life over the past 10 years and my silly mind started saying some of these little phrases.


I do hope you can laugh with me. If it's too early in your healing journey, then close this page and save it for a day when you are through the storm and are able to smile again. My intent is not to make your life harder. Nor is my intent to belittle the pain you are experiencing. As you know, I've been there. I endured the abuse for nearly 30 years. I've been right where you are. This is just a quick way to identify narcissistic behavior.


So here goes! What started out as a list of narcissistic traits has become my own little poetic way of reminding us all that these traits are NOT ok.



YOU JUST MIGHT BE WITH A NARC


If you feel inadequate all the time, you just might be with a narc;

If you are to blame for all your relationship problems, you just might be with a narc;

If you're sick a lot, you just might be with a narc;

If you feel isolated and alone, you just might be with a narc;

If you've read every self-help book, you just might be with a narc;

If all attention is on your significant other, you just might be with a narc;

If your husband withholds empathy, you just might be with a narc;

If you are laughed at when attempting to connect, you just might be with a narc;

If your husband rarely sees your point of view, you just might be with a narc;

If you are the brunt of his jokes, you just might be with a narc;

If you feel like you might be going crazy, you just might be with a narc;

If you spend all of your energy trying to make him happy, you just might be with a narc;

If you are perceived as a problem and he is a hero, you just might be with a narc;

If you cannot name your own desires, you just might be with a narc;

If the words, "What's wrong with you?" are common, you just might be with a narc;

If you feel like a child in his presence, you just might be with a narc;

If your best traits are minimized, you just might with a narc;

If you feel like you are on an emotional rollercoaster, you just might be with a narc;

If you are constantly interrupted, you just might be with a narc;

If he claims he is special, you just might be with a narc;

If the kids are required to fulfill his dreams, you just might be with a narc;

If you feel unknown, you just might be with a narc;

If you or the kids have been called names, you just might be with a narc;

If he "forgets" hurtful events you want to discuss, you just might be with a narc;

If you are constantly rummaging through a word salad, you just might be with a narc;

If racists remarks are made easily, you just might be with a narc;

If you feel uneasy but can't put a finger on why, you just might be with a narc;

If others feel sorry for your spouse, you just might be with a narc;

If he brings you a gift after destroying you, you just might be with a narc;

If you feel like you can't leave the kids alone with him, you just might be with a narc;

If you feel like a child is constantly pushing your boundaries, you just might be with a narc;

If you know God loves you but you just can't feel His love, you just might be with a narc;

If the children are considered the entertainment, you just might be with a narc;

If you are the parent who fully takes care of the children, you just might be with a narc;

If you arrive at church after a heated shame-fest in the car, you just might be with a narc;


(More to come)


If most of these words resonate with you but you've not ever been able to say that you are a victim of narcissistic abuse, then this is a first step. I want to offer my sincerest apologies for the grief that you are about to endure as you unpack your life and come to terms with this new reality. I am here for you. There are a lot of women just like you and me who have experienced this type of abuse and not understood it to be such. Take a deep breath, say a prayer, and in your own time, read more throughout this website. I've listed steps for you to take in your healing, I've written multiple blog posts, and I've listed many of the resources that helped me come through to the other side. You too can change your name from victim to victor! We're in the together! And in time, you will say, "I am no longer with a narc!"



Recent Posts

See All